In between.
I will always remember the quiet grief of watching others flourish while I struggled to survive. -Instagram reels
That quote has stuck in my mind since I saw it on Instagram reels. Maybe because it resonated with what has been happening in my life lately. I made a decision, and I need to face the consequences. But I am in a better place now, so not feeling sorry at all.
I am ‘in between’ seasons of my life right now. Someday, I feel stuck because I do not see progress, or I just have Impostor Syndrome and never see what I have achieved so far. But yes, I grieve watching the version of myself that will never happen.
There was an odd question from a person who looks like ‘always’ watching my every move. She said, “Aren't you feeling reverse culture shock?”
That is so freaking weird question. Like someone really waiting on my downfall or something. Like no? I am grateful for everything that his happening in my life right now. Just because I love to document my life and make content about it does not mean you know me. From that moment, I am not a fan of the ‘real life’ update feature like Instagram Story.
A big decision has been made, and I just need to wait for months for everything to change. I am preparing for something that I have no experience with before. Am I happy? Oh hell yeah absolutely. It is just so hard to process what was just happening, enjoying the present, and also looking forward to what will happen. It will be me and I.
I do not know if people can relate to this, or if this is just too personal for me. My anxiety has never been this bad, because it is something important.
See you when I arrive at my destination, not in between.
- Reupload from my Medium (Oct 9th 2025).
